


To Hell and Back

by roguelightning



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:20:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26933497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roguelightning/pseuds/roguelightning
Summary: Chloe misses Lucifer more than ever. So when she receives an offer to go to Hell, she cannot refuse it. Set before season 5.
Relationships: Chloe Decker & God, Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar
Comments: 9
Kudos: 21
Collections: Fic In A Box





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [the_wanlorn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_wanlorn/gifts).



> Hi there, the_wanlorn! So here's the thing. The lovely guys from fic_in_a_box matched us based on Supercorp but I also saw you asked for Deckerstar so yeah this happened. Actually I saw your prompt with Chloe punches God and while this is not exactly that... I wish I could say something nicer than 'actually I have personal issues with God and I used this as a coping mechanism' but I would be lying. On the bright side, this is also Deckerstar :). On the dark side, this is God being a major d*ck. I hope you don't mind that, but I figured you should be warned about this. I hope you like it though! It's the first time I wrote Deckerstar so maybe I didn't get the characters too well but I hope I did a good enough job :).

This was becoming a bad habit for her, Chloe decided as she got inside Lux that night. Ever since Lucifer had left, she had found her steps leading her there. It wasn’t that she drank too much – most nights she kept it to a beer or so, glaring at whatever man was trying to get too close to her.

That night had been no different, at first. Luckily, nobody had bothered her, so she sipped her beer with a sigh, her eyes fixated on the door. Not that she would have expected Lucifer to come through that door or anything. At least that was what she told herself. For a second, she regretted not taking Maze with her, but come to think at it, they had different ways of coping with Lucifer’s departure. And since Maze’s ways were either punching whoever got in her way or kissing them, Chloe was pretty sure she didn’t want her around, at least for the time being.

It was late in the night, so she wasn’t surprised to find the club mostly empty, only its most faithful customers still being around. She supposed she could be considered one of them too, actually. But she paid them no attention. Instead, her eyes fixated on an old black man who was sitting alone at the bar. It was weird seeing him there, she thought. Normally people who came into Lux were either looking to hook up or to drink something, or a combination of both. The man seemed to want nothing of that, however, instead looking all over the place with a contemplative gaze.

She didn’t realize she was staring until the man came to her table, a soft smile on his lips. She should have known better than to trust strangers, but there was something in his look that made her instantly drawn to him.

“Do you mind?” the old man asked as he pointed to the empty chair in front of her.

“I’m actually waiting for someone,” Chloe said, her tone a lot more friendly than it would have been with anybody else.

“Still waiting for your husband, huh?” the man asked with a smile.

“He’s not my husband,” Chloe sighed. “Also, why did you think I was married?” she asked as she lifted her palm at him. “See? No ring.”

“I’ve seen a lot at my age,” the man smiled. “You look like your husband has just gone to war and you’re waiting for him, not knowing if he’ll ever come back.”

This made her burst out in laughter. “Please, I’m not the pining type,” she said as she shook her head.

“But you do love him,” the man said on a tone that didn’t admit arguing. “And he’s still gone to what you think is a dangerous place, and you still have no idea when and if he will ever return.”

“How do you know this?”

“I knew a woman once,” the man smiled. “She loved her son more than anything. She raised him almost on her own, even when it was dangerous for her to do so, not asking for anything in return. And then one day, he left her. She knew he had to go away, and she knew he was going to get back eventually. Still, she had the same look on her face as you do now.”

“I didn’t lose my son,” Chloe argued.

“You still lost someone you loved. The sentiment remains, in the end.”

“Did she get her son back?”

“Back is relative,” the man smiled. “But she got to a point where she knew he was safe and that he was going to be watching for her for the rest of his life. Do you want to know what he told her before he left?” When Chloe didn’t answer, the man continued, “He told her that if God will allow it, he’ll be back to her.”

“Right. God,” Chloe smiled. “I still… haven’t figured out how I feel about Him.”

“But you’re not an atheist.”

“I can’t exactly afford to be one, as a matter of fact. Not after what I have seen. The devil is real, so I assume everything else is. It’s just that there are some things I don’t understand about God.”

“Such as?”

“It’s not like he got too involved with us after the first century, you know?” Chloe asked. “Like sure, there are some miracles people claim to have witnessed, but people don’t know the whole story. They don’t know the devil has been more in their lives than God has been, lately. Which is probably for the best because they think the devil is the bad guy, so they’d probably bring the pitchforks here if they knew the truth.”

“Here?”

“Well, you know,” Chloe said with an eyeroll. “Nightclubs are the devil’s work and all that. Or so they say,” she added quickly. She hoped she didn’t slip out too much.

“So you don’t think the devil is the bad guy, then.”

“He has helped me, at least. And I know deep down he’s a good man. Or angel. Being?” she tried. “I have no idea what he is, actually.”

“What about God? I mean if the devil is the good guy, do you think that… you know.”

“God is the bad one? No, I don’t think things are this black and white,” Chloe admitted. “Though I do wonder sometimes why God doesn’t care more about us.”

“I believe He does,” the man smiled. “It’s just that he wants you to make your own choices. But for this to be possible, he has to make other choices, and the burden of those choices hunts Him, and well. It’s not pleasant most of the times.”

“Yes but it’s not the same, is it?” Chloe asked. “When a human makes a choice, they don’t know the outcome. God does.”

“God knows every possible outcome, yes,” the man agreed. “And that’s exactly the problem.”

“I’m not sure I follow,” Chloe admitted.

“A few years ago, there has been a fire at a camping site,” the man said, a troubled look on his face as he told the tale. “Three children died that night. One could ask themselves, why did God not stop it? After all, if He’s almighty, he could have spared the children, right? Or kill just one of them if there had to be a victim that night.”

“This is the part where you tell me that if the children lived one of them would have ended up being the next Hitler or something?” Chloe mocked him.

“This is the part where I tell you that because one of those children died, tenths of people found their peace a few years after that. It wasn’t an easy choice and God knew that. He also knew that all three children needed to die. If just one of them would have been spared, the chain of events that was supposed to happen would have been broken. We’re all just cogs in an imperfect mechanism, Chloe,” the man smiled. “God is mostly just doing damage control.”

“Is this what you think?” Chloe challenged him. “That God has to choose between two evils and he always chooses the lesser one?”

“That’s oversimplifying things, but mostly, yes.”

“And then everybody lives happily ever after, except the parents of those kids,” Chloe smiled bitterly. “But in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t matter, does it? People found their peace, who cares if some kids died? The devil had to go back to Hell to protect the woman he loved, who cares if he left her alone?”

“He had no choice.”

“No, but you did,” Chloe spat at him. “And I get that you probably didn’t want this to happen, didn’t want us to happen, and I get that it doesn’t matter what some detective from L.A. wants when the whole world is at stake. Trust me, I get it,” she huffed. “But he still loves you. Sure, he talks shit about you most of the time and generally has the biggest daddy issues I’ve ever seen in a man, but he still loves you. He wants you to be proud of him, actually. Would it kill you to talk to him from time to time?”

The man gave no answer to that, instead stared at her intently, a smile playing on his lips. He half expected her to lower her eyes, but she gave no signs of submission.

“Chloe Decker,” the man finally said. “You turned out to be everything I hoped for, and more,” he smiled. “And to answer your question, I’m immortal, so no. But as I told you, I’m doing damage control. The alternative is way worse than this.”

“It’s not like the world will end, though,” Chloe sighed. The man raised an eyebrow at that.

“… Oh. So you’d rather have your son suffer than put the world in danger.”

“Comes with the job description once a few millennia, I’m afraid,” the man shrugged. “But I’m not here to talk about this. Tell me, Chloe Decker, if you could ask God anything, what would you ask for?”

“That’s just a different way of asking what I truly desire.”

“I’m not stealing lines from my son. Besides, we both know that doesn’t work on you.”

“How do I get to Hell?” Chloe blurted out.

“You meant it with a _not_ , didn’t you? How do you not get to Hell?” There was a sly grin on her lips as she closed the distance between them, determination burning in her eyes as she whispered, “You tell me, Dad.”


	2. Chapter 2

“You’re a good woman, Chloe Decker,” God said. “Good people don’t go to Hell.”

“Good people don’t fall in love with the devil, and yet here we are,” she challenged Him. “I don’t want to get him back, for the record. I get that he’s there to protect me, to protect all of us.”

“Then what do you want?”

“Closure, I think?” the detective said, her voice unsure. “I miss him. Is it that bad?”

“You can’t hate a cog in a machine because it’s doing exactly what she was intended to,” God replied with a smile.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“That’s a story for another day,” God said on an enigmatic tone. “But I cannot send you to Hell, Chloe. Not while you’re still alive.”

“I haven’t gone to Catholic school in a while, but last time I checked, suicides really pissed You off, didn’t they?”

“Going to Hell isn’t about pissing me off, Chloe. Common misconception, I know. But basically you just have to die and to regret something in your life, regret it so deeply that it eats you up.”

“Piece of cake, then,” Chloe said as she rolled her eyes.

“Except you don’t want a one way trip, you want to get back as well.”

“Debatable.”

“You would be with him, yes, but you still have people here who’d miss you,” God said with a smile. “Don’t tell me you’d choose him over Trixie.”

“Don’t tell me You’d make me choose between them.”

“I may be an ass, but I’m not that much of an ass. Besides, I know the outcomes to that. Regardless of your choice, you’ll hate me, and that… is not in the scope of this whole thing.”

“Of what?”

“Whatever this is,” God smiled. “It’s a long term project anyway, I won’t bore you with the details. But if you want to go to Hell, I can arrange that for you.”

“Just like that?”

“Oh no, there are terms and conditions,” God smiled. “And you’d better not treat them as the rest of the terms and conditions you met in your life.”

“I’m listening.”

“One, we didn’t have this talk,” God said on a definitive tone. “Which means he can’t know I sent you there.”

“So he has to think I died, then?” Chloe asked and God seemed to ponder a bit before answering. “I don’t want him to go back to Earth and avenge you, either,” he admitted.

“He’d do that,” Chloe laughed.

“He went to Hell for you once, you know,” God said with a smile. “I mean, one time you don’t know about. You know when you were poisoned and then he magically got the antidote? He took a trip to Hell for that.”

“And you wonder why I want to do this for him now,” Chloe huffed. “It seems that whatever I do for him, he’s already done it for me before.” To this, God gave no reply, instead made a feather appear into His hands. He slid it over the table to her, but she didn’t dare touch it.

“Is this…”

“You know how parents keep their babies’ teeth as memories? This is something like that,” He explained. “This was Lucifer’s, back when he was, you know,” He said as He pointed to the sky. “But it has a bit of essence of Hell in it as well, so it will serve its purpose.”

“Is this a one way ticket or a two way one?”

“I’m not going to answer that question.”

“So I just have to take it and hope you won’t be an ass, then.”

“I told you there are terms and conditions, Chloe,” God said gently. “Or I could take it away and we could pretend we never had this conversation.”

At this, she threw Him a glare, just before taking the feather in her hands. “Thank you,” she whispered as she closed her eyes. It was impossibly oft, and she found herself thinking what it would be like to touch his wings, all made of feathers like those. She almost remembered one time when he held her like that, his wings wrapped around her, but she couldn’t tell if it had been a dream or not. Then again, it was the same wings that had taken him from her, so she had mixed feelings about him. Still, to be carried away by them, flying over the city in his arms… She let herself dwell a bit about that, her eyes closing as her fingers ran along the feather.

“For the record, I can read your thoughts,” God said, and she had the decency to open her eyes and throw Him an ashamed look.

“Sorry,” she whispered.

“You’re not the first mortal to think about my son like- no, actually, you are,” God smiled. “Most people go down the thirsty route with him, you are one of the few who went soft.”

“How does this work?” she cut Him off with a glare. Actually, a change of subject would have really helped her at the time, she decided.

“Well, normally I’d say you touch them and you think about Hell, but since you’ve never been there… I will have to hope that thinking about Lucifer helps. Since he’s you know, the closest thing to Hell you’ve ever got.”

“Understood. And for what it’s worth, thank you.”

“You’re the first mortal who’s ever thanked me for sending her to hell, just so you know.”

“I’m the first mortal who’s been in love with the devil,” Chloe said on a defiant tone. “So I guess it comes with the… how did you put it? Job description?”

“Chloe Decker, you have no idea how close you are to the truth,” God smiled. “But until we meet again… take care of my son for me, alright?” It was the last thing He said before He disappeared, leaving her alone at the table.

The club was almost empty, she realized, but it still was a wonder nobody had noticed the old man disappearing. But it wasn’t the club she was interested in at the moment. She considered going after Maze for a second, to ask her about Hell and all that, but decided against it. She didn’t want anyone to give her cold feet about it, and then again she wasn’t sure she could trust Maze with that feather. No, she had to do this on her own, she decided as she gave the father a little squeeze and closed her eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

She shouldn’t have expected fire and brimstone – after all, she knew firsthand that whatever people thought of the devil was mostly wrong. So why should have Hell be any different? Still, she let out a sigh of relief when she opened her eyes again and found herself in an empty room. It looked a lot like Lucifer’s backstage at Lux, actually, and she couldn’t help walking around it, her fingers gliding over the piano that was in the middle of the room.

“Chloe,” a man sneered, disrupting her from her thoughts. She turned around and saw Lucifer, who was wearing his devil face once more. His clothes were charred, threads of them barely hanging on his red skin.

“Lucifer,” she said, unable to hold a sigh of relief as a small smile found its way to her lips, despite everything. “We need to talk.”

“No, we really don’t,” he spat at her before turning around, not willing to face her. “You sent me here, Chloe.”

“I never asked this of you,” Chloe argued, though her voice was barely a whisper now. She closed the distance between them, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder, but he turned back at her, grabbing her hand as he pushed her in the opposite wall.

“Don’t touch me again,” he said, his claws digging into her skin. She winced in pain, but still didn’t stop looking at him. He held her there for a few impossibly long seconds but then dropped her with a sigh.

“Why have you come here, detective?” he asked. “I can’t go back to Earth. And to be honest, I’m not sure I want to anymore.”

“But you said-“

“What I said was thousands of years ago, Chloe. Don’t you get it? Time goes differently here. I have no idea how much it has been for you, but for me it’s been millennia since I’ve last seen you. You know what they say. Out of sight, out of mind. I may have lasted more than most people, but I forgot about you in the end.”

“So you don’t have feelings for me anymore.”

“I didn’t say that,” Lucifer said, a devilish grin on his lips. “I have a lot of feelings for you humans. Just that they’re not the kind you’d like. As for you… You always made everything about you, didn’t you? Lucifer do this, Lucifer do that, pushing me around like I was your assistant or something. You knew the truth about me for a long time actually, didn’t you? But you didn’t want to admit it. What scared you more, Chloe? The fact that I was the devil or the fact that you were falling in love with me?”

“Both, actually,” Chloe smiled at him. “But can you really blame me for that? It was a lot to wrap my head around.”

“You don’t say,” Lucifer spat at her. “I liked L.A just fine before you showed up there, for the record. But then I had to fall for you and our love almost brought the apocalypse and I had to come back here. I should be a bit grateful for that, actually. A few thousands of years really made me appreciate what I have.”

“So you like being here now?”

“I am king here,” Lucifer said as he sat on the piano, a menacing grin spreading on his face. “I have an army of demons at my beck and call, I don’t need to bother with solving cases anymore.”

"You however," the demon-like figure snarled at her, "don't belong here. You're too much of a goodie two shoes for that. So tell me, detective, what do you want from me?"

"I don't know," Chloe admitted, her voice barely a whisper. "I didn't think this was going to end between us, I thought-"

"You thought wrong," Lucifer spat at her. "I've been telling you for years that I am the bloody devil, it's not my fault you took so long to accept it. But you're here now, and Dad knows an eternity with you is the last thing I want now, so you'll either have to get over whatever stupid guilt you carry or we'll have to avoid each other for all eternity. I would go with the second option if I were you," he said as he got closer to her, his breath hot on her neck. "I can make Hell very unpleasant for people I don't like." There was something do threatening, so foreign in his voice that she couldn't stop her tears from falling. She had sacrificed everything to get to him and this was how he repaid her? She knew he was telling the truth about not wanting to go back - after all, that was the one thing she could have been sure of, that he didn't lie- and a part of her hated herself for being so stupid. What did she expect, that he was going to hug her and that he will leave whatever cosmic duties he had for her?

Despite everything, she raised her eyes at him. "You wouldn't hurt me," she said, conviction finding its way to her voice. "I may not know much about you, but this I am sure of." But the demon only laughed at her.

"You have no idea what I am capable of, detective," he said, raising his hand as to strike her. She closed her eyes, preparing herself for the blow, but it didn't come.

"What in dad's name is this?" a voice asked and Chloe opened her eyes again.

The demon that was standing in front of her looked nothing like Lucifer now, his wings black instead of red, and he kneeled in front of the man that entered the room. 

"Newcomer, boss," the demon whispered. "I figured I should show her around before you came."

"She's mine," the man who had just entered the room snarled, and Chloe couldn't help a smile at that. This was Lucifer, her Lucifer, and everything felt right again. So she jumped back on her feet and hugged him, her arms digging into his human back with all the strength she was capable of. She almost melted into his touch as he hugged her back, and she buried her face into the crane of his neck, her sobs quieting as relief washed over her. She had no idea how much she stood like that until he broke from her hug and pushed her away just a bit, to get a good look at her.

"You're here," he whispered almost reverently, before terror came over him. She watched it find its way to his eyes, to the tremor of his voice. "You're here," he repeated in disbelief as his fingers dug into her shoulders. He looked downright horrified now. "Who did this to you?" he asked, and that was when she realized she had no choice.


	4. Chapter 4

“Lucifer,” she said slowly, choosing her words carefully as she let her fingers caress his cheek. “It’s not about me”, she whispered, her eyes never leaving his. “It’s not even about how I got here. It’s about how this makes you feel.”

“What’s that-“ the devil said, stopping mid-sentence as it dawned on him. He let out a tormented laugh as he realized the truth. “You’re not her, are you? Hell just finally got to me too.”

“I am not at liberty to say that,” Chloe said with a smile, hoping it would be enough. He had always been honest with her and lying to him wasn’t something she wanted to do. But telling him the truth was not an option either. She had no idea what being smitten felt like, but she sure as hell didn’t want to find out. In the end, it didn’t matter. She had been granted more time with him and that was all that mattered.

“What matters, Lucifer,” she said with a sigh, “is that I am here. Your detective. So if you have something to tell her, you might as well use me for that.”

“And give you material for torturing me?” he mocked her. “You’re not a very good demon, are you? You’re supposed to know what your victim fears the most, what they want. Maze was good at that, actually.”

“I’m actually new to this whole Hell thing,” Chloe admitted. “But I want to tell you something, Lucifer. Your detective loves you. All of you, which took her a while, but can you blame her for that? This-“ she said as she pointed to everything around her – “is pretty hard to take. But she did, eventually. Because you probably took way worse for her. Even you being here… I know how much you hated this place, how much you wanted to get away from this. But you chose to return just to keep her safe. And she may hate that you’re gone, and she may go each night to Lux hoping you will come back, but deep down she couldn’t be more grateful for this.”

“She wouldn’t do that,” Lucifer said, a smile playing on his lips. “The going to Lux every night part, I mean. She’s busy being the best detective in L.A, going to my club each night to cry after me doesn’t sound like her.”

“Who said she was crying?” Chloe asked with a glare. “She’s just… yearning a bit,” she said as she closed the distance between them and placed her hands on his shoulders. “Thinking about how she wants you there next to her, about how she wants to be held in your wants, your wings wrapped around her, how she should have kissed you harder, longer-“ she whispered as her lips came closer to his. She was probably crying at this point, she realized, but she didn’t care. Not when she had the chance of doing this, she decided as her lips finally touched his. But he took a step back at that, not daring to look her in her eyes.

“Who are you?” he asked as he eyed her suspiciously.

“Just someone torn between doing her job and missing the man- well, the angel actually – she fell in love with.”

“I didn’t realize I have fans down here too,” Lucifer said as a smile played on his lips. “You did say you were new, though. Most demons learn to hate me in time. I am not a good king.”

“Because you treat this like a job”, Chloe sighed. “One that was imposed on you, not one you chose, at least not in the beginning. But you’re willing to suffer for all eternity if that keeps her safe, don’t you?”

“I’m stupid like that, yeah,” Lucifer laughed.

“And tell me, Lucifer,” Chloe said with a sad smile, “if you’re stupid enough for that, what do you think she would do for you? Is it so farfetched to believe she would find a way to go to Hell for you? Not forever, at least not yet, because she still has people who need her up there, but just for a while. Just for a chance to touch you again, to kiss you again.” This froze him in his steps, causing a shocked look on his face, but before he had the chance to say anything, she crushed her lips to his, her fingers threading in his hair as she kissed him hard, putting all the yearning she had for him in that kiss. She barely felt the gust of air caused by his wings sprouting around her, but she couldn’t help a contended sigh as they enveloped her in a fluttery of feathers.

“It is you,” Lucifer whispered in horror when she broke the kiss. “Why, Chloe?” he asked, his voice trembling. “I have to get you back, I have to-“ he stuttered as he started pacing around the room. “You and I both know I don’t deserve this, damn it!” he yelled at her, frustration getting the better of him. “As much as I want you here, you’re the last person on Earth who deserves this.”

“I came here by choice, Lucifer,” she said with a determined look in her eyes. “And even if I can’t go back, this was worth it.”

“This was the most stupid thing you have ever done,” he whispered, unable to fight back the tears that were pricking his eyes. “But how-“

“Oh, Lucifer,” she said with a smile as she went to the piano and sat on it. “And to think you told me I was a lousy demon who didn’t know what your biggest fear is,” she laughed, putting all the malice she could muster in that laugh. “Turns out I do a pretty good job actually, don’t I, boss?” She hoped to hell that was going to convince him, because she had gone way further than she should have. Judging by the look on his face, she supposed it had.

“You think this is funny you-“ he screamed as he glared at her, but before he had the chance to say anything else, she turned the feather in her palm, disappearing from his sight.

With a sigh, he went to his cabinet and poured himself a glass. At least Hell had booze, if nothing else, he thought as he took a sip of the amber colored liquid. This was his father’s doing, somehow, he was sure of that. Just another way to torture him, even after he had done the right thing for the first time in millennia. But that she-demon had a point, he thought with a sigh. Chloe getting there, whether by death or by other means, was his greatest fear. He had chosen Hell only to keep her out of it, and if that didn’t work… No, he had to rethink his actions. Maybe help her from time to time with her cases, even if he didn’t go back up. But he was sure as hell not going to spend an eternity being king of that hellhole and not get in contact with her again. Little things were going to have to do, for the time being, at least.

Back in Heaven, God couldn’t help a smile on His lips.

“I knew you’d come around, son,” he said with a grin. “Just like cogs in a machine.”


End file.
